When I woke up, it's raining heavily outside. I dreamt about you lastnight. The dream also involved the hospital but you face and your body were still the same as beautiful as you were before. I saw you mom, and I wanted to cry, you looked tired after a working day. You were lying on the sofa and reading book. This image remind me of the past. It used to happen 1 year ago. There are only 2 people in our family but I feel enough to make me warm everytime I go home. But now, we can't be like this anymore, god takes from me even a little happiness. You've staying in hospital for 1 month already, I was not around. I needed to go to Singapore to finish this semester. You appeared in my dream everynight. Why did you want me to continue studying but being beside you this time? Why do you want to suffer everything yourself? I think I cant stand alone in this world, without you. I am sure that. Why cant the past turn back?
The 1st one I thought of when I woke up is you. I can't hide that I'm really missing you in every minutes. Maybe I miss all of the gorgeous time we had had together. Now, although you are still my lover, I feel that your love is not same as before. You've changed so much after 1 year we've seperated. The reason why I felt so hurt when you did something wrong is our happiness memory. I think it's trully happiness, so it bring out more pain than I thought. But I'm still loving you. After all these stuffs, I'm still loving you. I only understand how deep is my love until the day you did it to me. You are going there again, going further from me. I feel this time I can't control everything. It all depends on you and your decision. The way you live and the way you behave, I can't be there to help you.
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